Neighbors Gone Wild (wish they'd keep some shit to themselves)

I'm back....and in full effect....and shit. -shrug- Its been...what....a year? I attempted to blog right after Jourdin's departure from this world, and I just couldn't. Each post would turn into angry rants about my loss....but I'm okay now. I don't feel like stabbing that Fonzworth Bentley looking-bitch all in her giraffe neck anymore. Progress...y'all...progress ^_^ (I still hope that bitch gets hit by a CDTA bus tho'....hey its not as violent!). Since last year...I've lost 25 lbs....and my big ass is actually jogging (yes JOGGING) on a daily basis....once again progress.

Anyway.......I swear to white baby jesus that my life should be a sitcom. The weirdest off the wall shit always happens to me. I'm a magnet to madness.....sometimes I think God gets bored....and decides to fuck with me for amusement. I live on a fairly quiet block (except for the weekends). Its a really gay neighborhood.....meaning most of my neighbors are homosexual....and there's a popular gay bar across the street. For the past 2 years, I've lived upstairs from this quiet hetero couple. Last weekend the man handed my husband a dvd and said it was something he had been working on. So naturally, we thought it had something to do with music since everyone and their baby daddy's mother is trying to be a rapper now. The video starts out with him showing off his ghetto fabulous apartment and laptop...smdh...then cuts into some scenes of him dancing to various wack dance songs (jerk,stanky leg...ect.ect.). Suddenly,with no warning, this MUHFUGGA appears in white thongs (mind you he's OBESE) , a belly shirt, wig, and cowboy hat....dancing to "Single Ladies" o_O I had to cut it off....the next day I decided to finish watching the fuckery...out of curiosity....which I shouldn't have because at the end....he ends up being completely butt ass naked and greased (Crisco?) up. Talk about curiosity killing the cat (pun intended).

So now I am baffled, shocked, and confused. I feel like at any moment Ashton is gonna pop out talking about I've been Punk'd and shit. We spent the next few days trying to figure out why the fuck would this negro give this shit to us. Is he a freak? Is he a cross-dresser? Is he mentally ill? Is he gay and this is his way of coming out? He asked my husband if he saw it, my husband lied and said no, then homeboy was like "yo you should watch it, its comedy sketches. I'm going to send it to Ellen!" WHY THE FUCK IS YOUR BIG BLACK NAKED ASS DANCING TO MUHFUGGIN BEYONCE COMEDY?!?!?!?!? I mean there was no script, no storyline, no plot, no nothing...just pure fuckery. And now my eyes cannot unsee what they saw.....now I can't sit outside in peace without his ass popping up and wanting to talk about the damn video. I really want to be like "nigga, you are on some buffalo bill shit...and its creepy....and I am now convinced that you got some porky bitch locked in the cellar talking about some 'it puts the lotion on its skin' fuckouttamyface..." BUT I'm trying to keep the peace...you know cuz we have to live with our neighbors as crazy as them muhfuggas can be. I'm trying to find amusement in this......and I will keep y'all updated on whatever new fucked up shit he decides to make (he told us he's making another video....and we've heard him playing "Sex Therapy" on repeat)......be afraid....be very afraid.....

I need to change up my layout which is difficult to do on my BB....I'll try after this laundry is done. Follow me on twitter: @tnic0le

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